Dear Pretty Lady: You Are Not Cheap

Dear Pretty Lady,

I know there’s so much more to you than a pretty face and an attractive body.

So let me say this: you are worth far more than a booty call or a flirty text. You deserve more than mixed signals and promises unfulfilled. You cannot be demeaned by catcalls and lingering gazes.

You do not have to reveal your body to get men to like you. You do not have to distinguish your value based on the number of likes you get on social media. You do not have to post an album of selfies and bikini shots just to show everyone how pretty you are. You do not have to have a new boyfriend every time a relationship fails because it makes you feel secure. You do not have to starve yourself thin just so you can be as physically attractive as the photoshopped women on magazines. You do not have to change your values so that your peers would like you.

Just because everyone else is lowering their standards and values doesn’t mean that you should too. You were made to stand out. You may have had a messy past, but who doesn’t? You don’t have to doubt your worth, and you don’t have to prove it to other people.

Therefore I plead you, do not give in to someone just because he gives you the butterflies, because emotions are easily manipulated. Wait for the one who will pursue you like a dying man in the desert would pursue water, wait for the man who knows your true value – the way God sees you. Do not expose your precious body and soul to a man who does not understand that such a treasure is worth waiting and working for. Do not succumb to the pressures of this culture and cover yourself in piles of makeup and facades of personality just to be “cool” and accepted. You are beautiful just as you are, and friends who do not see that might not be real friends at all.

You are not defined by how many men court you, by how many followers you have, nor by how pretty everyone else says you are.

Your value was declared and decided when the One who is love gave up His life for you. Know who He says you are, His beloved, His princess. You are worth pursuing, you are worth waiting for, you are worth dying for.

You are worth so much more.

You are a series of complexities, layering upon the other, an endless adventure to the people who are privileged enough to be let in on your journey. You are every possible color slammed together in one canvas, an abstract appreciated by those who are educated enough to know that art encompasses a broad range of wonder, and induces a wide range of emotions.

There may be times you feel so filled by darkness that you cannot see beyond yourself, but trust me, you are the universe. And there are so many stars and galaxies living inside of you, waiting to burst and show true stellar potential.

You are gold, constantly being refined. You are a precious jewel, rare and hard to find.

You are a pearl, and you do not throw pearls to pigs.


17 thoughts on “Dear Pretty Lady: You Are Not Cheap

  1. I’ve been seeing your blog from my newsfeed because of my Christian teenage girl friends who have some special snowflake syndrome.

    First of all, as a linguistics / literature major myself, I like the way you put your ideas into words that most teenage to young adult women can easily relate to.

    However, the more I see your posts the more I notice something oddly similar with each one. A revolving theme around your posts are about being a special woman, not being cheap, being special this and that, that you should be valued, that God loves you, you are worth so much more, you’re made to stand out, guys should be thirsty and desperate to pursue you, etc. I know you get the point.

    I have to say that you have to be really careful about where you are heading. I don’t know you personally, but the hint of bitterness and insecurity is leaking from miles away. But your posts don’t show you are insecure? Well here’s the thing. If you are secure that God loves you so much and you are wonderful in His eyes, there is no need to fly this around everywhere. If you are really happy, you don’t need to post a status on Facebook that says you are #happy right?

    Aside from that, I think it is dangerous because I’m not sure where the “glorifying God” part is since it’s all about “us women being special, being worth it, being chased after, not being cheap, etc”. It’s like stealing God’s glory by using God Himself. I mean look at the men. Spirit-filled, secure, Godly men never (or rarely) write blogs or posts about how they are special, or how they are “worth it”. Why? Because they know everyone is worth it. Jesus died on the cross for everyone. Jesus wouldn’t think like oh yeah you’re a Christian woman, be pure and you’re worth it. This neo-christian-feminism should have no place in Christianity at all.

    When you say “you’re a princess, you’re worth waiting for, you’re worth dying for” a good Christian knows that already. Heck even a non-Christian believes that way too. The only problem with that is there’s too much emphasis on “you” rather than deny ourselves, bask in our weakness, and focus on Him. I like it when you tell girls not to reveal themselves, or expose some skin, but you have to make it clear to them why that it is more important to please God than this world. But never ever give these young girls the impression that they are already perfect just because God loves them. If they want to have a good and fit body, let them. It’s good for them too.

    Just focus on things that are Biblical truths and things that are important. Don’t flatter young ladies. You say things like don’t let your emotions deceive you. But you’re doing the same thing, you’re making them feel oh so special with your blog posts, that they think they have nothing left to change. Soon enough they become feminists and want to become pastors in the church.


    1. Hi, Stefan! I appreciate the way you take the time to read and comment. 🙂 I have to say, please do read the rest of my blog posts before accusing me of being insecure and bitter. The purpose of this post was to uplift ladies who give themselves away without thinking about your worth. Not once did I ever imply that they are perfect and that they shouldn’t change a thing. And as a woman, I must tell you that women need to be reminded of their worth. I also suggest you read my Being A Princess Doesn’t Mean Being A Spoiled Brat post if you think I am flattering young women entirely. 🙂

      I do like how you mention Biblical truths and fixing our eyes on Him. There is nothing I am more passionate about other than seeking Him and His heart. If you will read my other posts such as Stop Vulgarizing God, Loving A Cheater, Confessions of a Practicing Christian, Wide Eyed and Mystified, Obedient When It’s Convenient, Nothing Left, and Can You Keep A Secret, then I believe it would give you more of a glimpse into how I really view God and Christianity and all of this. 🙂 I actually have more posts like that than the “fluffy snowflake pieces” (I think I actually only have two of those, under your definition :)).

      Thank you for standing up for the true kind of Christianity, however again, I would rather there would have been no accusation in your comment if you hadn’t actually read everything I ever posted. Sadly, I can’t decide which of my posts go viral and which do not. But if you do know me in person, you would hear how frustrated I am that I can’t. 🙂 I appreciate you still, really. God bless you!

      Liked by 1 person

    1. This is in response to all your other comments too. Thank you for being such a sweetheart. I am blessed to have people like you, people I do not know, giving me encouragement. I am deeply grateful. ❤️
      Please continue sharing His love, beauty, and light! God bless you! ✨

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Thank you for your response. I truly appreciate it kasi I rarely receive replies from inspiring bloggers like you. I look forward for your future posts. May you have more blessed days to come! 🙂


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